I've finished translating a 5 page document. I told myself that I can be arsed to do it and I was. Yay me. The healing process continues - next challenge - get up for the lecture at 8am and prepare a lesson for the kid during the gap at uni.

Livelivelivelive.

Phew, good night.

The night is significantly colder and it starts to feel as if it was November already. I remind myself the sharpness of autumn air and thick mists hovering between the sidewalk and the street lamps.

Why this sudden leap forward? Of course it's a song. It roughly translates to 'Boys made of dynamite'

All the time, we're cold
We let our bodies stay so
We argue with our own malfunctions

I didn't want to rhyme that, sorry. I just wanted to translate the lyrics at least roughly into Common. Yes, our little modern Latin. So cover your long ears and read it as it is.

I decided to have a time trial on this one. I don't feel at ease at all so I guess that producing massive walls of text will help me forget that I should be asleep. I have developed the unnerving habit of staying up at least till 2am. Unfortunately, this thing tends to stretch in space in time.

At least I am not in game.

I feel very guilty at the moment, but the warmth of my fingers against the keyboard reminds me that I'm still the one who's alive and capable of making decisions. It's odd, as my hands would always get very cold after using the computer for a long time. Perhaps it's the laptop architecture that helps to keep them warm. There must be one helluva party going on down there, with volcanoes and barbecues.

I've spent the last minute madly skipping through songs. I shrug and shiver, trying to decide what sound fits my ears best.

Why the sudden urge to write? Perhaps it's the translating warm up I got earlier. I just hope it's not a scam and I can take M. to the cinema...

My back hurts but there is no way I'm going to bed. It just seems like a waste of time on those last days of freedom. Not to mention, that I wasted the grand majority of these days.

I lost focus in my eyes for a moment, it amazes me that it takes them 5 seconds to recharge and perceive again,readily.

Images and words. I won?

Nah, time's up. It's a tie.

Trees.

Such simple an answer, but the thing was about arch like structures near the fountain. I got to meet my 'brother', a friend I met on IRC and in-game. He's around 2,5h away by train, so it's not that bad and we finally had the chance to talk irl. Conclusions? He's not a psycho (at least he kept his guard up) in a bad sense and we get on without the cyberspace around as well.

How comforting. I should push myself to write. I HAVE written a story already. Now to write more, to press on.

M is away on a wedding. The more away she is, the more oxygenless I feel.


That's it for now - ending here not to go over the edge. Basically I'm resurrecting my writing habits.

... That I am a lazy ass bastard that does not find time to write new stuff on the blog. In fact I have a shitload of time on my hands. I just cannot manage it properly. I guess it may be due to the fact that I can't really mamage simple things.

I have noticed, of recently, that I tend to stay up very long. The deeper in the night, the more fucked up my ideas become, the quicker I think, the more ideas I have. I just wish I wasn't so tired after a day of doing nothing again, that I couldn't move my ass to write things down and so on.


Oh dear. I love Lanois' simple/poetic lyrics.


I stand on the edge, not fearing the fall, you're like a fleece like a new sole - get my drift? That's like... Two different words, yet still, that might be called reality. Where poetry meets the garbage can.

I'm quite happy, since I wrote a story. Twas' heavily based on in-game logs, but I finished it. It's a strange feeling when you finish a story. It's like sending your kid to school. lulz.

I should be working on another one now, the one less based on logs... But the amount of RP is so immense that I find it hard to sit down and just write it. Well, let's see...

I can make it. Right? I'll make it complex, so I can make it.



And if it's simple... Can I handle it?

Teach me, I know I'm not a hopeless case :) :*

stolen from markerdoodle

1. Anyone who looks at this entry has to post this meme and their current wallpaper.
2. Explain in five sentences why you're using that wallpaper!
3. Don't change your wallpaper before doing this! The point is to see what you had on!








1. Green is good for your eyes and I figured I'm bored of black in the back background.
2. I love 'demotywatory.pl'
3. I have no motivation to learn and I spend my time doing nothing useful
4. I like latest phrases to be put in meaningful contexts
5. I heard a good Jesus joke today xD

Stolen from khaoskomix LJ

The problem with Live Journal is that we all think we are so close, but really, we know nothing about each other. Hence, I want you to ask me something you think you should know about me. Something that should be obvious, but you have no idea about. Then post this in your LJ and find out what people don’t know about you.

...I was supposed to get married yesterday.

It doesn't matter that 07.06.09 was a Sunday. I would devote all my life to a person I thought to be the one.

I'm glad I didn't



...

Saturday evening, lazyness, lack of drive to study, even though I should.

Come, please, come. I'm alone

But

No matter

If...

Nah, they won't.


I found a way to camouflage myself under the bed in case of emergency. I cooked lunch for you, I did the washing up. And we had those little healthy study breaks, yes.

I'm pepperised on a steady dosage. The exam shall swing its axe at my head tomorrow.

And I still do not know half the guys we were talking about. How is it possible to know a name if it is nothing but letters and a date? How can I possibly know the person?

Oh, I got a rose today, a rose of appreciation. For teaching.

The roles switch. The calcium in my bones makes me feel so old...

Ah, yes, the notes.

Lit exam on Tuesday.

Gotta study... I translated an article on neurology last night... Facet joints, lumbar disc hernations, yay.

Now on to Shakespeare.

FUCK!

LJ just ate my three lines of LJ goodness.

I was just saying that I'm having a nice cuppatea. And that the dog is sniffing around my delivered box of Dr Pepper. Well, she isn't now, but was a while ago, just when LJ decided to start again.

Erase and rewind.

Anyway, I spent the day quite constructively, which is an obvious achievement, in the age of Alex the CBA. Perhaps that's because I could start the day with M? I'm prone to think so. Her smile brightens it all up.

I was in a good mood when I left the lesson. Yeah, I was teaching today, a new boy. It turned out that he's quite smart, just needs some pointers and clarification, I'm lucky to have clever kids as students.

When I was waiting for a bus home, I called M. Now, since her Dad already knows (and I'm not welcome there anymore, sigh.) we had to cut on phonecalls and messengers. We still have texting, which saves the day.

I decided to put down an amusing vision. The talk was about downloading music from the internet vs buying albums etc. I told her that if I was to write my awesome book and everyone would just download an e-book for free, there would be NO FANCY CASTLE IN IRELAND HELLO! :<

Then I reminded her, that if we are to own such a thing, we'd need to share with Mum. Which leads to a conclusion, that the castle would need to be of gothic origin... Thick walls and so on. We take the eastern wing, Mum takes the western wing... And we take the basement, too?

But why?

Well, you know, a little torture chamber...?

Oh,Honey, so there's more to that than (insert innocent ideas here)

Well, I thought you can tie me up when I'm on my PMS, and tell the locals that the castle is haunted, while I wail and writhe in chains, we'd make a lot of money in case of writing failure...

ROFLMAO ^^

Just one shot starts a canonade. From the joyous travel through the barrell, spreading the deathangel wings, up to the point where our sense of guilt slowly disappears into the air as an inconscpicuous line of smoke.

I heard a piece of music from Jedi Academy yesterday and the chain reaction started immediately. At first my associations moved to 'whoah the Return of the Jedi' sort of things. Soon after I began to think about the crucialities of role-playing that are often cruelly ignored by gamers... Instantly, the light and the dark side of the Force helped me to put things on the scales and form a action-reaction course.

Finally, my dreams (apart from being the everyday abstract stuff...) were filled with glorious visions of myself mastering the ability tu push and pull objects with the help of the Force. And Death Star appeared on the sky.

And the world was about to be created, so Mother Mary buried herself deep into the landscape, to give birth to it. And then she and Jesus argued why didn't they make Draenei as a race on earth...

Elves, ftw.

It takes just a little trigger...

And here we are...

Saturday being the last performance, the date set for the cast party could have only been tonight.

We attended, we attended, though I really had to be cautious, because... well let's face it: I never felt so tempted to shed away our little curtain of privacy and just snuggle up against you like an adopted pup.

Sigh.

I can't wait for the dvd of the production. I hope they include my scences from the 4th night... 'Tis true that when you play for the family - you give your best.

Enough of tired gibberish. But I'm glad that I at least wrote something :)

Today is the joyful day!

Today, the overwhelming love and happiness that Little Alex is experiencing met Reality. But not in a bad way. I just reminded myself that there are others around me, who do not live on kisses and sighs,but need rest,respect, food and attention.

How strange that being happy makes you temporarily blind to such things.

Of course I feel ashamed but I feel reinforced in a way. I know I'm learning. And I know that You are as well.

Things will always change and we already know that. But we need to keep up the pace. We'll learn, we don't know everything, and being aware of that will only help.


Keats, Shelley, forgive us.

But a happy sigh, mind You. A content one.

So much to write about, such a short attention span. It's partly because I'm tired and working on the production of As You Like It. Our little uni theatre, the Spinning Globe is working on the play and we're going to perform it three times next week :D


I had a really, really nice dinner tonight. And no, not all by myself. There's this relatively new Indian place in the Old Town (YAY!)so we decided to go posh and try it out.

Marvelous. I've always dreamed about talking for long hours about the world, anything and everything, in a flow of intelligent, entertaining conversation.

I almost thought it would never happen... but it did. And it is truly possible. Like a dream.

I had tears of happyness in my eyes. Just looking into those jades of yours.

The mist was hanging low just above the river. We walked slowly and carelessly, happy that our arses are not freezing. At last. The very shy Ms. Spring is showing off some flesh...

Hesitant embraces, low whispers.

What amazes me is that we find innocence even when we both know sparks fly and passion flows...

And it felt like the first time all over again.

I smile. And I think about those green, sparkling eyes... That whisper of yours '...impossible!'

Anything is possible. The more motley fool I, that I believe it.

Again.

Somewhere in South America… I’m not quite sure whether it was Brazil, Argentina or another country. Amy was very reluctant to give away any details. And I couldn’t possibly blame her for being secretive. Empty spaces left by understatement were perfect to fill them up with my own vision. She would say that if I ever write it down, I’ll probably colour it a bit, here and there, to make it look prettier than it in fact was.

Dobra, nienawidzę przypuszczeń i ciągłego braku pewności siebie w moich zdaniach… Leżałam teraz w wannie, o wiele dłużej niż pierwotnie planowałam i przypomniałam sobie tą małą scenę. Co z tego, jeśli po chwili pisania ogarnia mnie poczucie zaszczucia we własnej klatce?

Guess, maybe, perhaps, could, would, should and so on. I don’t want to be uncertain and insecure all the time… And I don’t want to be dry and factual either.

FFS

I’m tired. I’ll try again tomorrow. Learning to fail,hell yeah.


And now it's time for some sublime.

There we were, answering questions, seducing newcomers, cracking jokes and showing Achmed the Dead Terrorist to some oblivious members of staff.

Great time, great stuff, and my knees are hurting again, since it's been a while from the last time I had to stand on my legs for so long.


March is the month of cats. They purr, dance and meow meow meow.

And we hunger for the time
Time to heal, desire time
And our earth moves beneath
Our own dream landscape :)

A sort of homecoming, for sure :)

I think it's time to go to sleep.

I have been watching True Blood. I have written and translated a formal letter for a paid assignment.

Sitting in darkness, coughing that strange thing that's been grazing my throat since midday. Thinking about those green sparkling eyes.

It's so near yet...

One of those nights when I'm physically unable to go to sleep and I just stay up and type bullshit.

There are many theories about university students in Poland. Of course some of them are complete rubbish...

One of them, however, is true. A student is always hungry. That's a fact. Getting a student into a state of feeling pleasantly fed is a difficult task, yet extremely satisfying.

Another fact - students are always poor. Counting every penny in order to...BUY FOOD. The ultimate goal of our modest money earning endeavours.

When one combines the above statements, we face the epic : The Quest for Food.

Today, good Uncle Vladimir Ganjalf the Green shared some of his MacDonald's coupons with us... How benevolent of him! Me and M decided,that we'll use it for lunch after creative writing classes. We started to count the money... We had some photocopying to to as well, which was a priority...

Then we counted our scarce vault contents... We had 19.95zl... the two sets were 20.

5 groszy. 5 friggin groszy. Like 5 pennies.

The easiest way would be to find even a small 10 gr coin...no, nowhere. On our way to CW class I found 1 gr. Then in my wallet, miraculously 2gr...

So that's 2gr left.

Damn.

Wait! The fountain!!! We peeked in. No water, just some left-over snow. Hey, it's money there! That looks like 5gr, doesn't it? Yeah...

Are we...
Well, do we have a choice?
We can give up.
No, I'm hungry.
So am I.
Then I'll take that out.
Oh, you want...
I will.
Noo...
Wanna bet?
Sure.
A beer.
Deal

And M took the friggin coin from the snow xD Then we went to McD only to realise we have around 10 gr extra.

Yay for fountain-robbing!

You know, Baby...
Yeah...?
Let's give it back when we have a chance... I mean a coin like this.
Okay, we will. We will, Hun.
Good.

A squeeze of hand. Like a beat of two hearts being one.

Three words that have really lightened up my day. Many meanings, many interpretations. And of course, many different noms, each being special.

I've just finished preparing stuff for tomorrow. I've got 20 more minutes to enjoy the day fading away, only to make space for another one. I just had half a mug of cold, milky coffee. Perhaps that was kinda suicidal... Since I really want to get some sleep tonight. Nah, doesn't matter. I guess I'm tired enough to go to sleep like a baby anyway.

The tastes...the smells. All around me. Strolling in and out of our little world and visiting me when You're away. I sure as hell smile a lot today. I smile a lot more than I used to.

There's this bubbling feeling inside my brain-o-jellish cauldron that utters 'write, write, write' But I guess I'll tease it for a bit more. So far I'm trying to cut on my online hours and divide time into reading my academic stuffsies, spending time with Mum and Sis and do things I'm supposed to. Apart from the obvious. I like to have time for things. Like today for example.

Yes...Something good is in the making, definitely :)

Some of the pieces from WOTLK soundtrack are chilling. Especially Arthas, My Son...

And Mountains of Thunder are just beautiful.

13 minutes left. Yeah, I decided I should get at least 6 hours of sleep. Alex is becoming decent (haha, yeah, right ;p) these days. No more staying up online, grinding away like there's no tomorrow. Tomorrow comes soon and brings me the Truth in all her glory. New challenges, new quests, new situations that we face together.

Pwning reality brings an entirely new and tingly feeling. I think they call it satisfaction.

Night :)